Ivan the Bear: Redux!

At a recent conference on education policy I attended, a discussion ensued regarding the differences between countries where education and curriculum styles were concerned. Someone asked what were the differences, if any, between the way British and Europeans schools teach geography as opposed to the way Russian Federation schools teach it. Simply put, Russian Federation schools teach geography from the standpoint that Russia is the center of the world. On the other hand, the Brits and Euros teach their kids that Russia should be told they are the center of the world as long as Russia continues to supply them with much needed oil and natural gas. Does this viewpoint also apply to recent events in Georgia? Unquestionably.
It seems British and European leaders are wary about scolding Russia too harshly for their recent forays into Georgia for fear that Russia may decrease energy supplies, raise prices, or disrupt service provision. Both Gordon Brown and the British Foreign Minister have been, until just lately, notably silent on the Georgian problem. It wasn’t until August 12, four days after the initial attack, that Downing Street deemed it necessary to issue a message condemning Russia’s attack. And when Downing Street finally spoke out, they really didn’t say much.
Britain and most of Europe seem to be content with letting French President Sarkozy do the delicate political dirty work for them. To Sarkozy’s credit, he did negotiate an initial cease-fire, but even he had no illusions about the difficult road ahead. And a difficult road it has been. Just hours after the cease-fire had been announced, reports began to trickle in claiming Russian peacekeepers had broken the cease-fire and were marauding and ransacking local towns and villages. According to the BBC World Service (8/13), Russian peacekeepers had been allegedly spotting kidnapping Georgian women. I’m sure they weren’t absconding them to clean armored personnel carriers.
After a brief post-Cold War hibernation, the Ivan the Bear seems to be back. Clearly, Russia seems bent on reasserting itself on the world stage. So what can be done about it? As US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice pointed out, isolating Russia might be an answer. Isolation is certainly one strategy. However, isolating Russia is really only feasible as a short-term public policy solution. The world needs Russia as much as Russia needs the world. Taking a long view, Great Britain and the European Union need to put a higher policy priority on the development of long-term sustainable energy solutions. The Brits and the European Union need to let the bear know that bully politics have clear, long-term consequences.

And The World According to Surrealism...

Another map, this time for Mirek. This is the "Surrealist Map of the World" (From Vanetes, Brussels, 1929). Interestingly enough, the US doesn't even exist in this one.
Katharine Harmon mentions this map in her book "You Are Here", a sort of Surrealist's manifesto from 1925:

“Even more than patriotism – which is a quite commonplace sort of hysteria, though emptier and shorter-lived than most – we are disgusted by the idea of belonging to a country at all, which is the most bestial and least philosophic of the concepts to which we are all subjected.. Wherever Western civilization is dominant, all human contact has disappeared, except contact from which money can be made – payment in hard cash.”

Again, click on the map to enlarge it.

M, feedback?

The World According to Reagan

While researching cartograms for a policy development project, I recently came across a couple of fantastic maps. Simplified to the point of parody, "The World According to Reagan" map divides the world according to the "White Hats vs. the Black Hats" cowboy/Western cinema genre paradigm. (Click the map to enlarge it.)

White Hats (Sheriffs, Good Guys):
The USA
Thatcherland

White Hat Deputy Sheriffs, Posse members:
Japan Corporation
Israel
Our China (Taiwan)
Our Oil (Saudis)

Black Hat:
USSR (Godless, Communists, Liars and Spies)

Black Hat Stooges:
Muslim Fanatics (Iran, Pakistan and Afghanistan)
Their China
Soviet Colony (Cuba)
Socialists and Pacifists (France, Spain, etc.)


This one's for you, Daniel (x2).

The Very Worst Campaign Ever

Hillary Clinton had me. I was so certain she’d get the Democratic nomination that I smugly bet a good friend a necktie of his choice. (For the record, this friend likes Hermés ties…) However, I just cast my party primary vote for Barak Obama.
What happened with Clinton? Six months ago she seemed to be cruising down easy street in a cherried-out two-tone 1950’s Dodge Coronet. Now that same street has turned dark and foreboding, filled with the potholes of her own ego. The wheels of the Coronet are falling off, one by one.
It wasn’t so long ago that Clinton was raking in endorsements from celebrities like Elton John (I was so tempted to write “the Queen of England” here instead), Maya Angelou, and Barbara Streisand. Now, the defectors are as notable as the endorsers, and these defectors hold superdelegate authority. Joe Andrew of Indiana (a state Clinton won) announced on May 1 that he had switched his superdelegate vote to Obama after staunchly supporting Clinton. This move is interesting because it was Bill Clinton that had appointed Andrews to the head of the Democratic Convention in 1999. Other superdelegate defectors include Donald Payne of New Jersey, Jennifer McClellan of Virginia, and Harry Thomas Jr. of the District of Columbia.
So, why has all of this been happening? Negativity in her campaign hasn’t helped. Recent comments poisoning the debate with racial undertones has irritated and disappointed me. This should be about the power of ideas, not racial perceptions. She also seems prone to pandering, recently recounting an awkward story about drinking whiskey and shooting guns with her father in a effort to appeal to a more rural demographic. In the larger context, Clinton lost me because she lacks passion and personality. Granted, on a policy level she has more structurally mature ideas on how the country should be run than Obama. This being said, the office of the presidency has rarely been about policy, and more often about personality. Sad? Yes.
Just recently, Senator John Edwards (and his 24 delegate votes) endorsed Obama. In light of current events and trends, should this really come as much of a surprise to Democrats? Maybe. Didn’t the Clintons just watch the Superbowl at Edward’s South Carolina mansion? This could be the death-knell for Hillary. This should be the death-knell for Hillary. Take a hint, lady, your sweet ride just ran out of gas.

(Cartoon image by Mike Lane, Cagle Cartoons)

Trains of thought...

Tired of indifferent employees, stale, recirculated air, late arriving luggage, and cramped seats? Weary of long security checkpoint lines, rising fares, and empty customer service counters? If you have a moment, try taking the train. No, rail travel isn’t as speedy as air travel, but when you arrive at your destination feeling rested and relaxed, it just might be worth the extra time.
Being able to stretch out, plug in electronic devices, and stroll leisurely between cars has its advantages, but the best thing about taking the train is feeling human again, being treated like a valued customer. From the cheery young lady at the ticket counter smiling at me at 5:15 in the morning to the snappily dressed fellow collecting tickets, the staff on my recent Amtrak trip made me feel welcome and like they actually appreciated my business. Ah, what a refreshing change.
Personally, one of the only potential drawbacks of rail service is the ability to make cell phone calls. I neither want nor need to hear the personal and intimate (and often banal) details of anyone’s life at 5:30 in the morning. However, if this annoyance is the trade-off for physical comfort, I’ll take rail travel over air travel, thank you very much. According to an Amtrak employee, wireless internet access may also be available on some routes in the next year or so. If I have access to the internet, I just might be willing to forgive the fellow next to me jabbering incessantly into his cell phone about a sweater he bought in 1986.
Granted, my experience with train service is quite limited. For example, I have never ridden the rails in the UK, Europe, Asia or other countries. I haven’t even ridden commuter express trains on the East Coast of my own country. But if my recent journey on Amtrak’s Coast Starlight is any indicator of the state of rail travel in the US, I’ll be taking the train more often.

Scamming the Scammers

I think most of us would agree that email is a wonderful addition to our lives, opening lines of cheap and easy communication and allowing us to stay connected to an increasingly interconnected world. However, SPAM or junk email happens.

Have you ever received a "scam" letter from Africa or some other location? Usually these letters ask the receiver to "hold" money in an American or European bank account. Once the scammer has account authority, they proceed to bilk the replier out of a few thousand dollars or Euros through the auspices of an "advance fee" before the replier wises up. Worst case scenarios have even included victims traveling to Nigeria to confront scammers, only to end up as victims of violence (U.S. State Department Travel Warning: Nigeria 2008, http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_pa_tw/tw/tw_928.html).

So, what recourse do we really have? One tactic is to set up your own bogus email account and scam the scammers back. Posted below is the original scam letter I received, followed by my response:


Letter:

Subject: GREETINGS!
From: M E Fernandez
Date: Fri, 2 Nov 2007 04:39:50 +0100 (GMT+01:00)

GREETINGS!

From Mrs Maria Elena Fernandez,

I am the above named person from Philippine. I am married to Mr. Rodolfo FERNANDEZ who worked with Philippine embassy in Kuwait for nine years before we left to Philippine where he was re-appointed as a navy officer before his untimely death in the year 2005.

We were married for eleven years without a child. He died in his home country Philippine after a brief illness that lasted for only four days Before his death we were both born again Christian. Since his death I decided not to remarry or get a child outside my matrimonial home which the Bible is against. When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of $7.3Musd (Seven Million Three Hundred Thousand U.S. Dollars) in cash concealed in a trunk box and deposits it with a Security Company in Abidjan Cote d ivoire (West Africa) which he declare and register it as family valuables.

Recently, my Doctor told me that i have serious sickness which is cancer problem. The one that disturbs me most is the high blood pressure sickness. Having known my condition I decided to donate this fund to a church or individual that will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct herein. I want a church or individual that will use this fund for orphanages, widows, propagating the word of God and to endeavour that the house of God is maintained. The Bible made us to understand that Blessed is the hand that giveth I took this decision because I do not have any child that will inherit this money and my husband relatives are not Christians and I do not want my husband’s efforts to be used by unbelievers. This is why I am taking this decision to contact you.

I am not afraid of death hence I know where I am going. I know that I am going to be in the bosom of the Lord. Exodus 14 VS 14 says that the lord will fight my case and I shall hold my peace. I do not need any telephone communication for security purpose until this mission is accomplished.

With God all things are possible. As soon as I receive your reply with full assurance of your assistance, I shall give you the legal proof of this matter and contact of the security company in Abidjan where he deposited the trunk box. I will also issue you an authority letter that will prove you the present and legal beneficiary of this trunk box (fund). I want you and the church to always pray for me because the lord is my shepherd. My happiness is that I lived a life of a worthy Christian. Whoever that wants to serve the Lord must serve him in Spirit and Truth.

Hope to receive your reply.

Remain blessed in the Lord.
Yours in Christ,
Mrs Maria Elena Fernandez


--------------------
Response:

Dear Ms. Fernandez,


I was deeply saddened to hear about the death of your late husband, the esteemed Mr. Rodolfo Hernandez. The Philippines lost a great man and a national hero on the tragic and unfortunate day of his passing. I understand your desire to give your fortune away so that The Lord's Will May Be Done.

I am Father Craven Morehead of the Ecumenical Holy Faith and Bible Readers of the Born Again Messiah, Our Savior, Who Art In Heaven Church (EHFBRBAMOSWAIHC for short). We are located at the base of the lovely and verdant Coburg Hills in Oregon. We have over 10,000 members in this area and try to tend to the Lord's work, helping those less fortunate and less illiterate than ourselves. I, as a Holy Father, specialize in consoling widows, helping these poor and needful women to Come Hither Unto the Lord, and Feel The Special Light of The Passion of the Holy Device.

Your blessed letter came to me in a moment of great extremity and requirement. Our church is currently in need of money to rebuild our seven buildings, which were recently destroyed in a fire. We fear the fire was the work of that old villain, Satan himself. If we can rebuild our church, I have high hopes that we can reach even more unfortunate souls in this area, and perhaps even international widows, which are my specialty. God help us! We can really use that money, I thank Him and you for your wonderful offer!

Please email me with the details of how we may obtain the funds. May god bless you and your sizeable financial assets.


Yours in the Divine Epiphany of The Holy Ecumenical Spirit,



Dr. Craven Morehead


Holy Father and Professional Spiritual Consoler
The Ecumenical Holy Faith and Bible Readers
Of the Born Again Messiah,
Our Savior, Who Art in Heaven Church
Coburg Hills,
Oregon
USA



So- you may be asking yourself, "what's the point?" First of all, it is fun. I like the idea of scamming a scammer. Second, if I can waste a few hours of their time making them run back and forth to their local Western Union office, I'll gladly do it. Perhaps this will save some poor schmuck from being scammed. And third, the local police officials in many of these countries either don't have the resources to fight these scammers or lack the political will to do so.

If you want to send these folks a letter like this, I urge you to do so, but never give out any personal information whatsoever.

My Brief Brush With Nicole DuPort

Sitting next to you, watching your pupils dialate... You are straining to smile, such a criti-cal face, wanting wanting wanting yet another cigarette...

I met Nicole DuPort this weekend, and sat by her at a wedding for several unpleasant minutes. Having seen her in one film (Sonata, 2002), I was mildly pleased to have a moment to talk to My Very First Hollywood Actress Ever. However, after several very unlady-like burps and snide remarks, my interest began to dim... Ah well, the food was wonderful and the tiny duo of Sophie (6) and Julian (11) gave a great White Stripish performance of "Seven Nation Army". Sophie looked terrified on the drums, but Julian looked very much at home behind the Les Paul. Look for him in Teen Magazine in a year or so.